A Gentle Self-Love Guide To The ‘New Year, New Me’ Mindset

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‘New Year’ celebrations are a thing because we see each year as a blank slate, such as a brand new notebook or the exhilarating excitement you get seeing an unfurnished apartment. On top of it all, we can make infinite resolutions when a new year arrives. A new year signifies a fresh start, thus, making this the time to tell ourselves to eat a little healthier, exercise a bit more often, start reading some books, or just get our life together for once! We always take every new year as a chance to leave the past behind and transform ourselves into a brand new and better version of ourselves, but sometimes, that kind of mindset might backfire into self-loathing if the resolutions aren’t met. While it is still a great idea to set intentions for yourself, here are some of our gentle self-love guide to building good intentions for your life in the ‘New Year, New Me’ mindset.

Recognize your self-loathing

When it comes to self-loathing, it is actually a survival mechanism where your brain finds itself constantly testing for vulnerabilities and weaknesses as its way of protecting you. Another way to see it is your alter ego giving you constructive criticism that is actually destructive. The first step to self-love and self-acceptance is to work with your mind and reprogram its purpose for self-loathing. Retake full control of your life and remind yourself that you are in charge of your thoughts and the direction your life takes you.

Language matters

We are constantly bombarded by positive quotes daily through social media and our surroundings, and we try our best to incorporate them into our life. Whether you have them as your phone’s wallpaper or you make it a point to say positive things to yourself every day, it’s essential to realize when there’s a voice in your head that keeps fighting back and giving you snide comments to keep you stuck in self-loathing. Thus, the language you use with yourself matters. Set your intentions to use graceful and gentle speech, even when releasing self-loath. It’s crucial to remind yourself, “I might not like myself all the time, but I’m going to like myself right now.”

Don’t trust the voice in your head

Sometimes, we are not our own best friends, and that’s okay. Our mind can do a lot of wonderful things but it can also do quite a damage to our self-esteem. Depending on the kind of friend your mind is, set one of your intentions to stop listening to that negative part of your brain. Let’s be fair here, if one of your friends called you a failure or stupid or fat, there’s a 99% chance they’re not your friends anymore. Hence, set the same rule for your mind. Every time you hear negative self-talk, take a deep breath, acknowledge that you’re just having a hard time, and forgive yourself for it. Imagine your negative thoughts as a little paper boat and send them away in a river. You might not feel better immediately, but at least you managed to stop it on its track and move forward.

Always find something to be grateful for

Every New Year welcomes a surge of people googling “daily inspiration quotes” as a way to practice self-love and stay motivated and productive. However, a good place to start working on yourself is to practice gratitude. While optimism is a beautiful opportunity to change our behaviors for the better, focusing more on the gratitude side can significantly boost your wellbeing. Be grateful for every big or small achievement, such as your family, health, having a roof over your head, or even a mouth to eat with. If you’re finding it hard to start, starting a gratitude journal is the way to go!

Practice Acceptance

Self-improvement can be extremely difficult. Thus, begin your first steps by setting your intention right. It may take a while for flowers to bloom, so keep reminding yourself that each of us is trying the best we can. Regardless of our age, none of us have our lives figured out and constantly evolve every day. Basically, a continuous work-in-progress!



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